Saturday, March 27, 2004

hello, ok, I'm hoping this works, I'm about ready to pull my hair out with this junk.... i have a very short temper when it comes to anything to do with my computer... sigh
anyhow, I thought I'd do this chronologically and share with you a little more than just the goth pictures

To start off here are some pics from when we pranked Brygmann (you can read about it, it's in the feb archive)

this is dez and crystal


this is the kind of finished product, before it froze really well

since you all know what I look like with red hair, I'm not including a 'before' picture, but here is a 'the process of dying' picture

and ta da! here's the 'after' product.... the goth look

and I wasn't the only one dressed up over YQ, Eric dressed up as a pirate, he was part of the registration party that we had-- the whole weekend had a pirates of the carribean type theme.

and just so you can remember what we both really look like... well all except for my red hair... which has faded to a dark brown, here's a picture of Eric and I

well i hope you all enjoyed those! now that I have this figured out I can put fun pictures up more often... aren't you all very excited?!?
well it's drawing to the end of the semester, that point where you're just trying to get through those last few assignments, where you need more sleep but get at least half the amount you should be getting, and you spend most of the time you're not doing homework staring off with a spaced out look cause your brain is fried....

well I do feel tired for a good majority of the time but for the most part I'm doing ok, things are going well, homework and relationally... I haven't forgotten about what I need to work on (which I wrote about in my last post) which should be harder now more than ever, being the end of the semester it is usually where one has less patience with others and less motivation to improve themselves, and this requires a lot of work (which for the most part means good amount of prayer) seeing as it involves a change in attitude, a change in my outlook on others. BUT! I am seeing a change, which is awesome.

On the other side of relationships, things are going pretty swell with my new boyfriend... it's no longer strange and different (for others as well as myself... i had a lot of funny reactions when people found out I have a boyfriend, partly because it happened so fast, or happened when others weren't paying attention, and partly because most people viewed me as the girl who won't date anyone... sort of like the untamable wild bird or something.....), so some the uber excitement has died down, and will very soon start doing devotionals together... honestly (I was going to apologize for sounding sappy within the next sentence, but then decided I don't care if I sound sappy...) he truly is a blessing. One thing I knew that I would need in a relationship is someone who challenges and encourages me in my relationship with God, and I can already see that with Eric.

oh and as promised, I will put up photos of the goth look that I had for YQ weekend, I finally got the pictures developed and now just need to figure out how to upload them.... I think I'll go do that now... the pics will be up in the next day or two.

Thursday, March 11, 2004

Dez once again has inspired me,
well... we had already talked about needing to be kinder, needing to be better friends to those whom aren't neccessarily our favoritest people in the world. I don't mean to tolerate them better, but to love them with the respect that we give other friends.
But I didn't think to share this with you until reading Dez's blog. I suppose this is a good way to get accountability that I actually do make the attempt to change what I know needs to change.
God is constantly reminding me that I need to be more humble in my attitude towards others... I noted to Dez, when she was feeling like a jerk, that knowing that there needs to be a change is an accomplishment in itself. And this is true, but knowing you need to change and not making every effort to better it, is worse than not knowing at all... knowledge is a responsibility, I've learned that time and time again.

It's interesting how humanity clambours to grasp more and more knowledge, we pride ourselves in being learned and knowledgeable, but knowledge is a burdenous responsibility. If we have great amounts of that which we yearn to have, but use for no other reason than to claim that we are knowledgeable, what is the purpose in knowing?

Monday, March 08, 2004

I went for a walk today... I got wet squishy feet and for the first time in my life I honestly didn't care...

I played soccer for a summer when I was a kid, but everytime I had a game it was guaranteed to rain. So everytime I'd play soccer I'd get wet squishy feet (you know where every step you take you can hear it go squish squish, and feel the mud and water ooze around your toes) I remember once I quit halfway through a game because I couldn't stand the wet squishyness... my mother told me that I either had to go back out to the feild or go sit in the car for the rest of the game... I sat in the car with a huge pout on my face.

Right so you may be still wondering why all of a sudden I didn't mind. Well the factor of importance is the person I was walking with... I am proud to announce that i am no longer of the single status, for the person I was walking with is now my boyfriend. (AAAH!) This may come as a shock to some of you, but I have a boyfriend... and this one isn't a boyfriend in a box. It is truly a blessing from God, for those of you have been keeping up will remember that I was struggling to give up a situation to God, and it seemed that as I decided to really truly honestly give it up to God, he gave me back something much better.
This isn't an usual thing for God to do, the very existance of a Christian life is such as this; if we surrender our lives to God, if we give him all we've got, he will pour his blessing back upon the surrenderer. Now this doesn't mean he'll hand you an easy-living life with anything and everything you'd ever materially want.. but it does mean that life will hold more joy, it does mean that it will be more fulfilling.
Something that is kind of odd but relates to all of this is that at the beginning of the year I wrote some pithy statements on my wall, of things that I need to keep in mind. One of them reminds me that life is indeed good, and if it isn't I should remember something better is coming. Another I wrote tells me to "go easy on the planning, more than likely God has something else in mind... and probably something better" I mean these things quite frequently apply to life, that's why they're pithy statements, but it's kind of cool when you can see where in life those things need to be remembered.
Righto, I need to jet, have a Scientology paper that I need to write, but thought I'd just quickly catch y'all up on the exciting news.

Friday, March 05, 2004

Alrighty peoples,
well I've been quite busy trying to keep up with the homework, and I haven't got much time right now to write but i wanted to share with you some of the awesome things that have been going down. First off I'm much better (health-wise) than I was last weekend, so yay! And I just want to quickly share with you some of the blessings God has been pouring out on me this week.
I have had problems in the past with being socially lazy.... this is another one of those terms that I've made up and am going to have to explain. For those of you who know me you will testify that I am a very chipper and chatty person, who has no problem being friendly. But despite being personable and expressive, I am in fact socially lazy. What is this illusive term I keep using? well, socially lazy just means that I don't go out of my way to initiate friendships, organize get togethers, I won't invite myself places, and I will rarely be the person to call someone else and suggest that we do something... but it's not that I don't like hanging out with people, I think it mostly comes from an insecurity, I'm usually uncertain of whether or not people like me, and don't want to annoy them by pursuing a friendship where it is maybe is not wanted.... so I will just let my friends pick me, and be the ones to invite me places and so forth.
Anyhow, although I've begun to remedy this problem of being socially lazy, it still has resulted in me only hanging out with the same people all the time. Not that they aren't great people but God has very much blessed me over the last little while with some new and challenging friends. I've been getting to know a great girl (DEZ!) more and more these past few months and this past week I've been getting to know a few acquaintences better.
It was really exciting for me, because these friends encourage different aspects of life, one girl I've been getting to know, we went to a presidential debate together, and is always reminding me to pray over whatever is going on in my life... and I've been finding in general that a lot of these girls challenge me to think about new and different things, and also challenge me in my growth with God.
Right so, I will stop rambling, but I just want to finish off with wow! I am truly blessed with some great friends, girls and guys, and want to thank God for that blessing.
Gnite kiddies!